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An Interrupted Dawn

A fresh sadness has cast its cold shadow over me. It caught me by surprise but not because I’m unaccustomed to flickering light. I’m too old to be unaccustomed to such common things. I’m not afraid. Just surprised. Surprised because I thought it was morning.

 2020 was such a dark year. Like you, no doubt, the global darkness of the pandemic fell like a lead blanket over a personal season that would also throw a wool shawl over my man & me. Our 2 kids did just what they we’re supposed to do. They grew up. To our great fortune, we still
got to live a lot of family life. The halls of our house rang a constant ruckus. Grandchildren running, skating, cartwheeling, dancing, leaping, hiphopping, dog-ball-throwing, nerf gun launching. Adults eating, discussing, debating, arguing, discoursing and opining as Moores do.
Then the Lord moved one. Then the others. Moved them far away. I blame it entirely on the Lord because that’s how I can accept and embrace it as good. I know it was him because even I can look at it—at what he’s orchestrated for my people—& nod & say, Amen. So be it. It is well.
What he’d given Keith & me in having both our girls & their loves all these years was a gift, not a right. Amen. So be it. It is well. I hesitate to write this part because my girls will see it & I know they will hate it because they love their mother. So I’ll say it quickly like
ripping off a bandaid. Our bright home turned to coal. I lack 1000 things but God made me resilient. I could go so far as to say he made me happy. I don’t stay down long and, by his kindness, this was no exception. Some 6 weeks later, we were making adjustments, Keith & me.
I am a believer in the abundant fruitful life. I take my right to joy seriously. I believe to my bones, if we’re in him & 1 part of the life shrinks, if we’ll ask him, trust him, partner with him, he’ll make another part grow. And he did. Literally. I set my mind to grow things.
I’d made an unlikely friend. A woman around my age, my no-nonsense no-social media polar opposite, whom Keith found to help with some of our acreage. She’s a magician. Can grow anything. Can do most anything. A beekeeper. Tree whisperer. She began to teach me. I began to grow.
And I began to grow things. I’d grown interested in the last few years. Had begun trying my hand at grapevines. Awkward at it. But loved it. I kept those up, added an herb garden. Still in a pandemic. Still ached for family but gardening was good medicine. The sun shines outside.
Added fruit trees. And my friend & I made plans for a small vegetable garden this Spring. She was supposed to return 3 weeks ago. Found out 2 days ago my gardener friend, my beekeeping Sensei, would not be coming back at all. Didn’t get to say goodbye. Don’t know what happened.
Keith says they’re planning to move. I texted her. Told her what joy she brought me & I’d miss her so & always thank God for her.

I feel silly saying it. It’s overdramatic. I know it’s temporary. But, just like that, an unexpected a shadow fell & sadness pierced clean thru me.
I’m not the precious kind. I may be an optimist but I’m not remotely an idealist. I’ve always thought life would break your heart. Never lived an overprotected life. Not in childhood. Not in adulthood. I know aches and pains. I’m hearty.

It’s just that I thought it was morning.
And that we - I mean all of us now who bear the effects of living through an isolating global pandemic - were on the cusp of a little brighter day.

And here’s what I want you to know. It’s the reason I’ve written this yawning account to you this morning. We are, I believe.
Oh I think this earth will still quake & we’ll face dark days again & again. But I do think a little brighter day out from under some of the oppression of this pandemic is indeed coming. I just want to tell you in advance so you might not be caught off guard: dawns can get long.
They can get interrupted. We can think, finally! The future is straightahead. All forward motion. A bath of light. Then clouds shift over the sun. Doesn’t mean it’s suddenly night. It just means the day takes longer to break sometimes than we would like. So we wait, you and I.
We wait for daybreak as those who know it is coming. We do not fear when the shadows shift. We need not even fear when the night calls. For the Lord is our light. Our sun and our moon and our stars. Our shimmer upon the waters.
Though dawn be interrupted, the Day is on His way.
Amen. So be it. It is well.

More from Beth Moore

Beth Moore
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@BethMooreLPM
“So Moses finished the work.” (Exodus 40:33) I came to the end of my reading in Exodus this morning. To fully appreciate those 5 words, you really need to read the 39 preceding chapters. The whole thing had been such an ordeal, drama from the time God called out to Moses from

the burning bush to the moment he “inspected all the work they had accomplished” in the building of the tabernacle. For starters, Moses wasn’t looking to lead anything but sheep to pasture. He was hiding when God found him. Moses was no volunteer. And even after God called him,

he insisted God find someone else. But the force of the divine call is hard to resist. The people he served nearly drove him nuts. He was supposed to lead a group of worshippers and what he mostly got was whiners. He’d lost his temper over & over. Even thrown the stone tablets

inscribed by the finger of God. Nope. Moses couldn’t say it had gone well. What the whole thing had been was WORK. Unrelenting, frustrating work so detailed that it had to match the divine instructions down to every clasp on endless yards of curtains. There had been some great

moments like the time the people were invited to contribute any personal possessions to the makings of the tabernacle furnishings. They had given so freely, Moses had to tell them to stop. There was that. But overall, what he’d done, what they’d all done, was WORK. Lo & behold,
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My reading today was Exodus 32. Moses has been on the mountain with God, hearing the instructions for the tabernacle & receiving the stone tablets. The people below, who’d seen the smoke above & heard the thunder &, that very morning, filled their bellies with bread from heaven,

decided Moses & that God above were taking too long. They needed a god below who would get with it. Get with them. Get them where they wanted to go. So they gathered around Aaron & said, “Come, make gods for us!” The same Aaron of Ex 24 who’d been invited by God to see the very

pavement beneath God’s feet. Aaron & his sons & the 70 elders, “saw Him and they ate and drank.” That Aaron. So he tells them in Ex 32, Bring me your gold & let’s see what I can do. He fashions it into the image of a calf & they present it to Israel in wording shudderingly

blasphemous. “Israel, these are your gods, who brought you up from the land of Egypt.” Over and over God has reminded them not to forget who had brought them out. Perhaps this started making Aaron a little nervous. Or maybe it didn’t. Maybe he just bought in. But his next move

is particularly telling. “When he saw this (the masses reacting to the gold idol he’d fashioned for them), he built an altar in front of it and made an announcement: ‘there will be a festival to the Lord tomorrow.’ Early the next morning they arose, offered burnt offerings &
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Beth Moore
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@BethMooreLPM
In Exodus now in my daily Bible reading. Chapters 3-4. God finds Moses on the far side of the wilderness. Calls to him from a burning shrub that attracts his attention—not because it’s on fire but—because the fire is not destroying it. That’s a lesson right there. There’s fire

that lights up, fire that heats, fire that draws forth the worship of God. Then there’s unholy fire that utterly destroys. The difference is obvious in its wake. God tells Moses to say to the Israelites, “I have paid close attention to you & to what has been done to you.” Always.

God is faithful. He sees. He knows. He will act. God tells Moses his name to authorize him then performs wonders to prove he’ll empower him. The former prince of Egypt replies with a line that makes me want to laugh every time I read it: “Please, Lord, I have never been eloquent

—either in the past or recently or since you have been speaking to your servant...” In other words, “Lord, there you are and here I am and, as great as you are, I’m no better than I was.” Then the Lord replies with something I find so profound: “Go! I will teach you what to say.”

Not “I will TELL you what to say.” He says, “I will TEACH you.” Three verses later, God repeats the same idea: “I will teach you both (Moses and Aaron) what to do.” We’d anticipate the word “tell” in both cases. In fact, it’s often what we prefer. Sometimes we want God to simply
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Beth Moore
Beth Moore
@BethMooreLPM
Oh man, I loved my Bible reading this morning. It was Exodus 28 where God gave Moses the instructions for the priestly apparel Aaron & his sons were to wear. The attention to the minutest detail confirms what we can still count on today: everything God prescribed had purpose.

Whether or not they understood it, whether or not we understand it, God is not haphazard. Nothing is for nothing. For me, one of the most marvelous parts of Bible study is how often he does tie things together for us, connecting the dots, connecting the testaments, the covenants.

I’ll just offer 1 example from Ex 28. V.3 says “You are to instruct all the skilled artisans, whom I’ve filled with a spirit of wisdom (isn’t that fantastic?), to make Aaron’s garments for consecrating him to serve Me as priest.” The turban was an important piece of the apparel.

Something I find particularly fascinating is that the skilled artisans were to make a pure gold nameplate to fasten onto the very front of the priest’s turban. It was to have 4 words engraved on it -all caps in our Bibles- “HOLY TO THE LORD. “It is always to be on his forehead.”

Imagine how a conversation would change if we were talking to a person while staring at those four words on his or her forehead. Ok, fast forward to the New Testament where the Holy Spirit says through Peter that we who are in Christ are part of a “royal priesthood.” (2 Pet 2:9)
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Beth Moore
Beth Moore
@BethMooreLPM
Well, folks, the reason I haven’t been sharing many short clips from my morning readings lately is that, well, I’m in chapters 11-17 of Ezekiel. They involve complicated visions that don’t lend themselves to Twitter threads. But at the end of my reading today in Ezek 17,

God delivered a word to the prophet depicting a theme that may be uncomfortable but it’s not incomprehensible.

“I bring down the tall tree and make the low tree tall. I cause the green tree to wither and make the withered tree thrive. I, the Lord, have spoken and I will do it.”

God’s got this thing about pride. He does not let it go unchecked. When his people continue in arrogance after multiple warnings, he is going to bring them down. He will turn the tables. That which has been high will be brought low. This is why we are told by both James and Peter

in the NT that God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. We need his grace so badly. Repentance is our only real way forward. He also views idolatry as spiritual adultery. This was the case in the judgment that was coming to his people through the Babylonians.

We are caught in a cycle. We keep repeating the same offenses and keep excusing them the exact same ways. Study even just the last century. I beg you to. Face how we evangelicals have bedded down with worldly systems for power. See how every time prophetic voices confronted us
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