TW: Abuse

[THREAD] Let's talk about recognizing signs of emotional abuse. For a lot of people, it can be hard to recognize those signs, especially early on, or we may not realize what they were until we have suffered under them and it affected our mental health.

For the most part, people who engage in a lot of emotional abuse won't show it at the very beginning. They need feelings to develop or an attachment to happen in order to be able to show those signs when it is harder for the other person to leave. It can also be progressive.
However, there are some ways to recognize those signs early on. One of the main ones is how these people talk about others they shared a relationship with in the past. If every ex was a bad person or every friendship has issues, then it is generally a bad sign.
This is especially true for men who may badmouth women they have been it by calling them names that are not worth typing. That's a big red flag because it means that this man is likely to be the bad person here. They may be volatile even in their friendships.
They seemingly seem to lose friends quickly and get new ones quickly. This is because these friends may recognize the toxic tendencies of the person and leave them, and they constantly have to integrate with new people that they want to use for one purpose or another.
It is also important to notice how they talk about others, specifically those they see as below their "station". Are they mean to the wait staff in a restaurant, their cab driver, homeless individuals? That's a really bad sign because it shows they can't empathize with others.
Furthermore, they may become explosive at times when things don't go their way, and then quickly try to regain their composure because they are still in the "impress" phase of the new relationship or friendship. They can also often make very inappropriate jokes.
Playing the "devil's advocate" is also a bad sign. Doing it from time to time is not a big red flag but if they are always defending racism, sexism, homophobia and other human rights under the guise of playing devil's advocate, then it is a huge red flag.
Being obsessed with money and power is also a big red flag. There is nothing bad about having ambition and wanting to earn more money. But when they always compare their wealth to that of others or judge people simply because they are poorer or have less "power", then it is bad.
They may see the whole world as a power dynamic where they need to be on top. They see it as putting others down because it makes them feel like their status is elevated in exchange. These are some signs of a potentially emotional abuser.
If you notice too many of these signs or even your intuition saying that something is very wrong here, please trust your instincts. Don't disregard them or always say to yourself that you need to give this person the benefit of the doubt. You deserve to be safe 💚

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