I hear a critic in my head.

He says: If I have so many negative things to say about BCS, why did I go there in the first place? If I don’t like John Piper’s theology, why did I sit under it for four years?

The short answer is that going into seminary I was incredibly naive. 🧵

As a teenager, I found myself wanting more out of God, frankly. The G/god that I’d encountered in my church was authoritarian and tribal. And that left a vacuum in my soul. Then I discovered Piper’s sermons, etc., and I was immediately drawn to the “bigness” of Piper’s vision.

After college, I knew I wanted to go to seminary. I was leaning toward Calvinist theology, and I held vaguely complementarian views from my growing up years. I had gleaned from Piper here and there, and my wife was from MN, and things came together so that I could attend BCS.

But almost from day one, seminary there didn’t feel right. And that feeling grew and gnawed at me over the years. I never felt like I was safe at BCS. I was always an outsider. Partly because I could never make the leap to Calvinism.

Entering seminary, I had appreciated Piper’s “Christian Hedonist” mantra: “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him.” But that appreciation began to wane over the years at BCS.