..imagine a supersized energizer bunny. Because he's inarticulate, he uses alternative communication. However, it happens that he just runs out of what he could form out as words in his mouth or utilize a way to communicate his intent. He can grow frustrated at not being
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This is a long post. Triggered. Our son is 24 years old. He has autism (diagnosed at the age of 19 months, and NOT by Google). Among others, his ability to speak is limited. When he's happy, he jumps up & down & claps his hands, laughing out loudly & like a ball of energy..
..imagine a supersized energizer bunny. Because he's inarticulate, he uses alternative communication. However, it happens that he just runs out of what he could form out as words in his mouth or utilize a way to communicate his intent. He can grow frustrated at not being
able to get his meaning across. So, he yells and yells. At times, it isn't easy to stop it even though we have established key words that ought to help him simmer down. If not, I just let him blow that steam off until he cries. He cries like someone has died...howling even
He cries out of that frustration until he gets tired and stops. It is upsetting and breaks my heart each time.
I admit that when he was younger, we didn't bring him out as much because we didn't want him to make others uncomfortable. But now, I take the view that this is just wrong. This behavior does not define who he is. He is obedient (the most out of my three kids),
has a ready smile & smooch, considerate & hearty. I'll not deny my son his pursuit of happiness (he loves the mall & eating out). He's already limited, why would I set more boundaries? As his family, we do our best to protect him. We do this out of love, not because of pride
Please allow me to just debunk what has been said that "one word from a responsible parent is enough to make a child quiet down". This statement rolled off someone's tongue who either has no kids or likely was indifferent to his own.
Even a "normal" child, in certain situations, would be hard to quiet down. As for our son, since he was diagnosed, to the best of our abilities, we have not stopped in tapping resources to optimize his ability to communicate (both ways, to be on the giving and receiving end)
How could we not? Any parent would give anything to have lucid conversation with their child. But the reality is, there are cases in which this is not attainable in the conventional way. So we adjust, we accommodate.
Our society is governed by rules of convention, how this and that should be done. If one acts outside of these, knowing glances and snide comments abound. The result: intolerance, bias, discrimination, even hate. This happens in a non-inclusive environment, meaning,
there is no consideration, no empathy for those who may be differently abled or situated. I wonder, did even-handedness in applying policy mean exercising equality or equity? That difference is huge. This is what #PlantationBay does not get. Call a spade a spade.
#PlantationBay is NOT supportive of the community of parents with children who have special needs. But in the off chance they really want to be supportive, learn more about the differently abled. Huwag lang Gu-gelin. Katamaran yan and most insincere.
Sit down and consult with experts, with the families. See and appreciate our situation by trying to even stand in our own shoes. Then talk to us about equitable application of policies. That is real even-handedness.
Lastly, what happened here was not an isolated case at all. It happens everyday and everywhere. I am not glad at all that Fin and his mom got to experience this and what should have been a fun memorable time made forgettable.
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1/“What would need to be true for you to….X”
Why is this the most powerful question you can ask when attempting to reach an agreement with another human being or organization?
A thread, co-written by @deanmbrody:
2/ First, “X” could be lots of things. Examples: What would need to be true for you to
- “Feel it's in our best interest for me to be CMO"
- “Feel that we’re in a good place as a company”
- “Feel that we’re on the same page”
- “Feel that we both got what we wanted from this deal
3/ Normally, we aren’t that direct. Example from startup/VC land:
Founders leave VC meetings thinking that every VC will invest, but they rarely do.
Worse over, the founders don’t know what they need to do in order to be fundable.
4/ So why should you ask the magic Q?
To get clarity.
You want to know where you stand, and what it takes to get what you want in a way that also gets them what they want.
It also holds them (mentally) accountable once the thing they need becomes true.
5/ Staying in the context of soliciting investors, the question is “what would need to be true for you to want to invest (or partner with us on this journey, etc)?”
Multiple responses to this question are likely to deliver a positive result.
Why is this the most powerful question you can ask when attempting to reach an agreement with another human being or organization?
A thread, co-written by @deanmbrody:
Next level tactic when closing a sale, candidate, or investment:
— Erik Torenberg (@eriktorenberg) February 27, 2018
Ask: \u201cWhat needs to be true for you to be all in?\u201d
You'll usually get an explicit answer that you might not get otherwise. It also holds them accountable once the thing they need becomes true.
2/ First, “X” could be lots of things. Examples: What would need to be true for you to
- “Feel it's in our best interest for me to be CMO"
- “Feel that we’re in a good place as a company”
- “Feel that we’re on the same page”
- “Feel that we both got what we wanted from this deal
3/ Normally, we aren’t that direct. Example from startup/VC land:
Founders leave VC meetings thinking that every VC will invest, but they rarely do.
Worse over, the founders don’t know what they need to do in order to be fundable.
4/ So why should you ask the magic Q?
To get clarity.
You want to know where you stand, and what it takes to get what you want in a way that also gets them what they want.
It also holds them (mentally) accountable once the thing they need becomes true.
5/ Staying in the context of soliciting investors, the question is “what would need to be true for you to want to invest (or partner with us on this journey, etc)?”
Multiple responses to this question are likely to deliver a positive result.
