"Hello, IT? My economy has stopped working."

"Have you tried -"

"Yes."

"Okay. Check settings. What does it say under software?"

"Compatible with EU membership."

"Do you have that?"

"I just uninstalled it."

"Er - Why?"

"Honestly, I can't remember. Something about fish?"

"Is your fish industry running okay?"

"No, actually that was the first app to crash."

"You see, that one really needs the EU platform installed."

"Really? But my mate told me fishing would run better without it."

"He sounds confused. Can you reinstall your EU app?"
"What about this app my mate gave me instead? It's called Sovereignty 45."

"Mate, don't touch that. It's malware. It'll reduce your economy down to the levels of 1945."

"But those were the glory years! Weren't they?"

"Mate, when were you born?"

"1960. Why?”
“You have also installed the Hostile Environment firewall which is limiting the capacity of other systems”

"But my mate said those things stop viruses."

"Is your mate's name Nigel by any chance?"

"Yes! How did you -"
"Another wild stab. Those aren't viruses, they are EU workers, and they are vital to the smooth running of your systems."

"But I clicked on a pop-up that said it would get rid of them all for me."
"Yes, I'm beginning to deduce your modus operandi. Well, at least you've called me now. You'll just have to run your economy at half-power until I get your new membership installed."

"And do you have strange marks on your fingernails, indicating vitamin deficiency? "
"I do! How did you know?"

"An inspired guess. Listen - don't touch anything. Restart your economy in safe mode, restoring Single Market and Customs Union. That should sort it for now."
As much as I'd love to take credit for this, it was passed on to me and a few others to share from Facebook.
Ok, the original author of this BRILLIANT tweet is @WeNeedEU.
Thank you for brightening so many people's day 👏👏👏

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