I have time today.

Joshua Harris is apparently discontinuing publication of I Kissed Dating Goodbye & its followups (including Boy Meets Girl which I would argue is maybe worse). Great. Eventually maybe I won't have to keep buying every copy I find in a thrift store so no one else does.
Let's take a look at his "explanation" (I won't call it an "apology" since that implies genuine repentance and a good faith effort to do something to fix the actual problem at hand but okay)… Link here or in the pictures below https://t.co/1unwQueOIA
Some highlights:

"Two years ago I began a process of re-evaluating the book."

Welcome to the party, Josh. We figured you weren't coming.
He says he regrets implying that premarital kissing (a phrase I cannot believe I still have to utter) was a sin, but then recommends instead books such as Boundaries in Dating by Dr. Henry Cloud and True Love Dates by Debra Fileta, both of which teach abstinence until marriage.
They're also both notably silent on LGBTQIA+ issues. I went to Debra Fileta's website and typed "premarital" into the search box and got lots of article results, but nothing for "LGBT" "gay" or "homosexual." If you don't talk about it, it doesn't exist, right !!
Anyway, he goes on to say, "To those who read my book and were misdirected or unhelpfully influenced by it…" um. LOL. "Misdirected" is what happens when Siri tells me to take a road that's closed for construction. "Unhelpfully influenced" is that one friend who always buys shots
Joshua Harris' role in mass producing and popularizing the precepts of purity culture for a generation goes so far beyond "misdirection" and "unhelpful influence" I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Of course it wasn't JUST Harris, there's an entire Purity Industrial Complex.
But like it or not, #purityculture is a form of sexual violence as @hannahboning says, and Harris wittingly or unwittingly played a HUGE role in perpetrating that violence against a generation of young people. It's not just that he was too harsh about kissing before marriage. 🙃
Telling people that the divine ruler of the universe expects them to remain sexually abstinent until legal monogamous marriage between a cishet man and a cishet woman for life is trash and abusive theology whether you say it nicely or not. #purityculture
Anyway, here's the real kicker: "I regret any way that my ideas restricted you, hurt you, or gave you a less-than-biblical view of yourself, your sexuality, your relationships, and God." I couldn't say it any better than this: https://t.co/DuB5Cxk6jj
"Biblical view of yourself, your sexuality, your relationships" = dog whistle to the conservatives. Nothing more, nothing less. Harris is "apologizing," sort of, for how his original views were LESS THAN "biblical," and "biblical" in this context means purity culture.
Harris hasn't actually changed the meat of his views at all. It's clear that he still believes that anything other than total sexual abstinence until legal monogamous marriage between a cishet man & a cishet woman for life is still sin or not God's best or not ideal or whatever.
What he's "sorry" for is the parts of his teachings that made our friends look at us like we were martians when we explained that actually, we wouldn't be kissing until our wedding day. He's not sorry for any of the basis of those teachings at all. Ask me how I know?
The production people for Joshua Harris' documentary (for which he raised over $40,000 USD by the way) actually reached out to me a few months ago asking me if they could use a clip from this video in the documentary: https://t.co/XvbJ6aORTf

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#தினம்_ஒரு_திருவாசகம்
தொல்லை இரும்பிறவிச் சூழும் தளை நீக்கி
அல்லல் அறுத்து ஆனந்தம் ஆக்கியதே – எல்லை
மருவா நெறியளிக்கும் வாதவூர் எங்கோன்
திருவாசகம் என்னும் தேன்

பொருள்:
1.எப்போது ஆரம்பித்தது என அறியப்படமுடியாத தொலை காலமாக (தொல்லை)

2. இருந்து வரும் (இரும்)


3.பிறவிப் பயணத்திலே ஆழ்த்துகின்ற (பிறவி சூழும்)

4.அறியாமையாகிய இடரை (தளை)

5.அகற்றி (நீக்கி),

6.அதன் விளைவால் சுகதுக்கமெனும் துயரங்கள் விலக (அல்லல் அறுத்து),

7.முழுநிறைவாய்த் தன்னுளே இறைவனை உணர்த்துவதே (ஆனந்த மாக்கியதே),

8.பிறந்து இறக்கும் காலவெளிகளில் (எல்லை)

9.பிணைக்காமல் (மருவா)

10.காக்கும் மெய்யறிவினைத் தருகின்ற (நெறியளிக்கும்),

11.என் தலைவனான மாணிக்க வாசகரின் (வாதவூரெங்கோன்)

12.திருவாசகம் எனும் தேன் (திருவா சகமென்னுந் தேன்)

முதல்வரி: பிறவி என்பது முன்வினை விதையால் முளைப்பதோர் பெருமரம். அந்த ‘முன்வினை’ எங்கு ஆரம்பித்தது எனச் சொல்ல இயலாது. ஆனால் ‘அறியாமை’ ஒன்றே ஆசைக்கும்,, அச்சத்துக்கும் காரணம் என்பதால், அவையே வினைகளை விளைவிப்பன என்பதால், தொடர்ந்து வரும் பிறவிகளுக்கு, ‘அறியாமையே’ காரணம்

அறியாமைக்கு ஆரம்பம் கிடையாது. நமக்கு ஒரு பொருளைப் பற்றிய அறிவு எப்போதிருந்து இல்லை? அதைச் சொல்ல முடியாது. அதனாலேதான் முதலடியில், ஆரம்பமில்லாத அஞ்ஞானத்தை பிறவிகளுக்குக் காரணமாகச் சொல்லியது. ஆனால் அறியாமை, அறிவின் எழுச்சியால், அப்போதே முடிந்து விடும்.

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