When we exceed our "setting," we unconsciously sabotage ourselves to come back into the familiar/comfortable "temperature."
Everyone has ONLY one problem.
And it's the SAME problem.
It's called: The Upper Limit Problem.
Here is everything you need to understand and solve it 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽
When we exceed our "setting," we unconsciously sabotage ourselves to come back into the familiar/comfortable "temperature."
It's a proven fact that most lotto winners, regardless of the size of the prize, report similar or LOWER happiness 5-10 years post win.
So much "success" in one area overwhelms their neurosis and they "bring themselves down" in other areas
The rock star who develops a drug problem.
The entrepreneur who makes it big and then loses it all.
The sports star who gets a huge injury.
Big financial win, you fight with your spouse.
Got married, your startup fails.
Book published, you broke your leg.
@GayHendricks tackles this in his amazing book "The Big Leap" and I was taught it by @davekashen through his work with @ConsciousLG .
It has changed my life plus created an entirely new perspective for me.
Here is my summary:
1) Feeling fundamentally flawed
2) Disloyalty and Abandonment
3) More success = Bigger burden
4) Fear of outshining
Let's unpack:
"The biggest and most widely shared fear is that we feel there is something fundamentally wrong with us and we are unworthy of great success and happiness"
We hold ourselves back because we believe we don't deserve it.
Is that really true? It doesn't have to be.
The unconscious thing your brain says: "I cannot expand to my full creative genius because something is fundamentally wrong with me"
We fear too much success is abandoning our roots and will leave us alone.
Think: Why do so many celebs have an "entourage?"
"I cannot expand to my full success because it would cause me to end up all alone, be disloyal to my roots and leave behind people from my past"
Remember the Biggie song, mo money mo problems?
Your brain: "I can't expand to my highest potential because I'd be an even bigger burden than I am now"
Classic in gifted kids with siblings.
They are taught if you shine too much, you'll make others look or feel bad.
Success triggers this fear.
Brain: "I must not expand to my full success, if I did I will outshine ______ and __ would look/feel bad"
You can't fix something you don't notice so "awareness" is the most impt.
The common behaviors when you're upper limiting:
+ Doubt
+ Worry
+ Criticism
+ Blame
+ Guilt
+ And even, getting sick... (seriously)
Self-sabotage.
When you notice these behaviors, how do you address them?
I do and have done many of these things and can confirm they absolutely work and have led me to great success (and they are very much still a WIP)
First step - Notice. Slow down.
Take a breath.
Make space to notice when you are doing these behaviors.
Find the outer edge of your "thermostat."
What happens that causes you to worry/criticize/negative self talk.
Your thermostat has been set/reinforced your whole life.
Worry/blame/negative talk will come back consistently.
That's ok. It's your ego protecting itself.
@GayHendricks suggests this Mantra (which I can vouch for albeit a bit corny):
"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day, as I inspire those around me to do the same."
Write it down once a day. Post on your computer.
Say it.
"Letting yourself savor natural good feelings is a direct way to transcend your Upper Limit Problem.
By extending your ability to feel positive feelings, you expand your tolerance for things going well in your life."
"Your activities in this zone are the things you most love to do and the things that bring you most abundance and satisfaction per time spent."
Things that you are good at, that bring you success and that give you ENERGY.
Things they are good at and may bring success, but that deplete their energy, this is not sustainable.
I believe you can raise your Upper Limit and the results are incredible.
You will notice more success with less effort.
Things will feel "Lucky." And yes you, can have it all.
Last, my favorite quote from the book:
Here’s what this intriguing statement means:
the very same mechanisms that produce excitement also produce fear, and any fear can be transformed into excitement by breathing fully with it."
I tweet about bootstrapping, DTC, growth marketing and personal growth.
RT this thread to teach others about THE UPPER LIMIT PROBLEM so we all can enjoy more success/happiness!
